Supporting a Loved One With Dementia Over Christmas

Christmas is often seen as a warm, joyful time, but for families caring for someone with dementia the festive season can bring a mix of emotions. While the celebrations can create moments of connection, the noise, lights and changes in routine can also feel overwhelming for someone living with cognitive decline.

If you have a parent, partner or relative with dementia, Christmas may look different now - but it can still be meaningful, manageable and calm. With gentle planning and the right support, families can help their loved one feel included while reducing stress for carers.

This guide offers both practical suggestions and essential legal considerations that often become particularly important at this time of year.

Understanding Why Christmas Can Be Challenging

Many people with dementia find unfamiliar environments, busy gatherings and rapid changes unsettling. Christmas brings:

• louder noise levels

• flashing lights and decorations

• disrupted daily routines

• long visits or large groups

• emotional triggers linked to memories
  

These changes can cause confusion, agitation or withdrawal. Recognising this helps families plan Christmas with empathy and patience.

Keep the Festive Period Calm and Predictable

A predictable routine is one of the most helpful things you can offer. While you don’t need to cancel celebrations, simple adjustments can make a big difference:

• keep gatherings small and manageable

• limit background noise (television, music, loud conversations)

• offer a quiet room where they can take breaks

• avoid overwhelming sensory changes

• plan shorter visits rather than long days
  

Even small steps can prevent confusion and help your loved one feel more secure.

Involve Them in Ways That Feel Comfortable

Inclusion matters. Many people with dementia still enjoy being part of Christmas preparations when activities are simple and familiar.

Ideas include:

• listening to music from their younger years

• helping wrap a few small presents

• looking through old photographs

• stirring cake mixture

• adding ornaments to the tree

• going for short walks to see Christmas lights
  

These moments can be grounding and help maintain a sense of belonging.

Support for Family Members and Carers

Caring for someone with dementia can be emotionally exhausting, especially at Christmas when many families feel pressure to create a “perfect” day.

It’s important for carers to:

• share responsibilities with family members

• accept offers of help

• take short breaks when needed

• keep expectations realistic
  

You do not have to do everything yourself. Christmas is a chance to spread the load so that everyone - including the carers - has space to enjoy the day.

Why Christmas Often Highlights the Need for Legal Planning

Many families first notice changes in a loved one’s memory or behaviour when everyone is together at Christmas. This can prompt important conversations about legal planning - and the sooner these plans are made, the more control your loved one has over their future.

Key documents to consider include:

Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA)

An LPA allows someone (the “attorney”) to make decisions for the person with dementia (the “donor”) if they lose mental capacity in the future.

There are two types:

1. Property and Financial Affairs LPA - managing bank accounts, bills, pensions, and property

2. Health and Welfare LPA - making decisions about care, medical treatment and daily routines
   

It is important to make an LPA before mental capacity becomes an issue. Without one, decisions can become far more complicated and stressful for families.

Court of Protection and Deputyship

If someone already lacks capacity and has not made an LPA, families may need to apply to the Court of Protection for a Deputyship Order. This allows a trusted person to make decisions on the person’s behalf.

While the system is there to protect vulnerable adults, the process can take months and is usually more costly and administratively heavy than making an LPA early.

Reviewing or Updating Their Will

Christmas often prompts families to talk openly about the future. If your loved one’s circumstances have changed, it may be sensible to review their Will.

A Will should reflect:

• changes in family structure

• updated financial circumstances

• new grandchildren

• specific wishes regarding gifts or property
  

If mental capacity is borderline, obtaining a solicitor’s involvement and challenging capacity assessment are essential.

How to Approach Legal Conversations Gently

These discussions can feel uncomfortable, but the way they are raised makes a big difference.

Consider:

• choosing a quiet, calm moment

• keeping the conversation short and simple

• avoiding pressure or urgency

• reassuring them the aim is protection, not loss of independence

• returning to the conversation another day if needed
  

Some families find it easier to begin with practical examples, such as paying bills or managing medical decisions.

Spotting Signs That More Support May Be Needed

If you notice these changes during Christmas, it may be time to seek help:

• confusion in familiar places

• difficulty recognising close family

• agitation in social situations

• wandering, especially at night

• increasing memory loss

• sudden changes in mood or behaviour
  

Your GP, memory clinic or local dementia services can provide assessments and support.

Local Support in Sussex

Sussex has a strong network of dementia-friendly organisations, including:

• local dementia cafés

• community support groups

• carer respite services

• charities offering Christmas check-ins for isolated elderly people
  

These organisations can ease pressure and provide practical help.

How Claire Nash Solicitors Can Support You

We regularly help families across Sussex with:

• Lasting Powers of Attorney

• Deputyship applications

• Wills

• Safeguarding elderly and vulnerable adults

• Support when a loved one can no longer manage their affairs
  

Our approach is calm, patient and sensitive. We can guide you through every step, at a pace that suits your family.